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OK, these're a few things which've bugged me ever since the nouveau geek invaded the 'Net.
1. "Emails." No such word. Hearken back for a moment to the time when the only mail was that which existed on processed tree pulp. Did anyone ever refer to it as "mails?" Did you go to the corner postbox to drop off "a mail?" Did the postal carrier drop off `mails' at your door? Of course not. Here's a shocker for you, folks--the fact that it now also has an electronic format does not alter the rules of proper grammar. You can email a document, you can receive email (which can refer to single or multiple email messages), but referring to "emails" or "an email" only marks you as illiterate.
2. Abuse of apostrophes. The apostrophe has only two purposes in the modern English language: contractions and possessives. It is never used for plural forms, or whatever other assinine reasons some of you keep creating. Learn your goddam grammar already, people! Kee-rist.
3. This one's more of a personal twitch issue than the first two, but people who refer to software written by other people as being their own somehow annoy me. "My Netscape is broken!" No, unless you're on the Netscape development team, it's not your Netscape. It may be your installation of Netscape, but Netscape certainly isn't yours. It's not like your Toyota, which is a physical object you can indeed lay claim to.
There. I feel better now. In next week's installment we'll touch on "good" vs "well," "lay" vs "lie," and why Grenada is not pronounced like "Grenade ah," despite idiot journalists. (And anyone who complains that I ended a sentence with a preposition gets toothpaste on their toilet seat.)
1. "Emails." No such word. Hearken back for a moment to the time when the only mail was that which existed on processed tree pulp. Did anyone ever refer to it as "mails?" Did you go to the corner postbox to drop off "a mail?" Did the postal carrier drop off `mails' at your door? Of course not. Here's a shocker for you, folks--the fact that it now also has an electronic format does not alter the rules of proper grammar. You can email a document, you can receive email (which can refer to single or multiple email messages), but referring to "emails" or "an email" only marks you as illiterate.
2. Abuse of apostrophes. The apostrophe has only two purposes in the modern English language: contractions and possessives. It is never used for plural forms, or whatever other assinine reasons some of you keep creating. Learn your goddam grammar already, people! Kee-rist.
3. This one's more of a personal twitch issue than the first two, but people who refer to software written by other people as being their own somehow annoy me. "My Netscape is broken!" No, unless you're on the Netscape development team, it's not your Netscape. It may be your installation of Netscape, but Netscape certainly isn't yours. It's not like your Toyota, which is a physical object you can indeed lay claim to.
There. I feel better now. In next week's installment we'll touch on "good" vs "well," "lay" vs "lie," and why Grenada is not pronounced like "Grenade ah," despite idiot journalists. (And anyone who complains that I ended a sentence with a preposition gets toothpaste on their toilet seat.)
